Saturday, December 26, 2009

Marital rating scale

From The Art of Manliness, a website which seeks to bring back the "art" of traditional manliness. I really don't get the art part though.

Ever wondered how to properly rate a wife? We got the answer with our amazing wife rating chart!

And a husband one too! Has he forgotten to give you your allowance? Demerit!

Always love some good ol' vintage sexism!

Wednesday, December 23, 2009

Sarah Haskins!

That women is a genius.

About Christmas

Many would argue that Christmas is actually just a demonstration of the consumism that permeates our society. I agree. But it is fun, and it is nice to have two weeks off from school!
So I say, hooray to Christmas!

What I want for Christmas:

1.A mini-car/motorcycle/both

2.YOU! (I mean, not, you, the reader, you you)

3.Money…urgently needed

4.Lily Allen’s new CD (and no, not from E-Mule)

5.Two skateboards! My best friend & I must absolutely learn.

6.Become suddenly able to speak Latin perfectly

7.To pass the technical drawing test!

8.To enter school at 12 am and leave at 1

9.To go on holiday somewhere with my friends this summer

10.Ummm, I guess that’s all.

Why I like Christmas:

1.Because I can sleep ‘till late for two weeks

2.Because I receive gifts, even though not really what I want (see above)

3.Because people keep thanking me for the gifts they receive. And YOU hugged me!

4.Because I can eat a lot of YUMMY things-but I do that all the time, so not really.

5.Did I mention I can sleep ‘till late?

Why I hate Christmas:

1.Because I can’t buy gifts for free.

2.Because my money is never enough to buy the non-free gifts.

3.Because if I don’t go to school how can I talk to YOU? I can’t even see You!

4.Because my mobile can never send enough texts. My credit lasts even less than usual! Which is very bad, because neither my mother nor I have enough money left to re-charge it. And she gets mad.

5.Because it’s really a senseless holiday.

"Fat is Beautiful"- a non-beautiful TV program

Yesterday they put on a new program on Italia1 (a Berlusconi owned station, whose only purpose is to objectify women, I think). It's called "Ciccia e' bella" (i.e.Fat is beautiful) and it's an absolutely disgusting thing, IMO.

The show claims to be able to raise fat people's self esteem without making them lose weight. It seems the only way your self esteem can grow is by taking nude photographs and having them put on a great bill-board in Milan.

Pratically, it goes like this:

1.Fat girl (but not really too fat, just not stick thin) talks about how much she hates herself and her body and how she has panic attacks when looking in the mirror.

2.Stick thin counselor tells her how much she loves her (despite the fact that they've just met) and tells her to place herself among a line of people ranging from a little-bit fat and obese. I imagine it mustn't feel very good to be the one at the end of the line, but anyway. Girl places herself at the end, counselor moves her to her right place (near the beginning) and girl gushes and says she can't believe it.

3.Photo of girl wearing only a bra and panties is placed on a billboard. Passing people are intervewed and asked what they think of her body, while she watches. Most say she is pretty, especially her breasts (tits, they say.) She's happy.

4.People she knows are interviewed and asked what they think if her. They all love her. She's surprised and pleased but says she doesn't care what people she knows think, because she just wants strangers to like her body.

5.Now she takes her clothes off and a photographer tells her what kind of expensive underwear she should put on to look sexy. She puts it on and he says it's sexy.

6.A nutritionist tells her how to eat

7.A beauty expert makes her hair barbie-blond and puts her make-up on etc. At the end she looks pretty much like everyone else on the show-uncreative and plastic-like

8.She models and feels great for having entered history. Because, I mean, what should one wish to be remembered for except looking pretty on a catwalk?

9..She takes a nude photoshoot which will be displayed in public and feels that now she is fully actualized.

10.She goes home and tells everyone how proud she is of having taken a nude shoot! Hooray, self-esteem gained!