Friday, November 20, 2009

The second movie about sparkly vampires: New Moon

The 18th of November, and you probably know this (well, you do if you live around teenage girls or near a theatre), was the day of New Moon's premiere.

Well, I certainly liked New Moon better than Twilight, mostly because the sparkly vampire and his family disappear for most of the movie, making it less vomitable.
Now, I can't say I didn't enjoy the movie at all (it is very, very hard not to enjoy an incredibly sexy werewolf and his muscles...), but some things were really disturbing.

THE STORY (spoilers)

Bella has a creepy dream about herself becoming old (OH NO!) while sparkly vampire Edward is of course still young (well, young, considering he's more than 100 years old....). . He sparkles a lot in her dream.
She wakes up, and it's her birthday. She is sad because it means she's getting old.

Then she goes to her birthday party at Edward's house, where she cuts her hand and a guy with bad halloween make-up and hair that desperately needs a comb tries to kill her. So Edward decides to leave Bella, and she assumes that's because she isn't good enough for him. Because of course a  possesive stalker sparly vampire is far too good for anyone, right?

But Bella has incredible strenght, and quickly gets over him. She just becomes a walking zombie, doesn't talk with anyone, sits alone at the Cullen's table pretending they're there and spends her days looking out her window and writing e-mails to Alice's  (another sparkly vampire) fake address. After about six months her father starts worrying, so she is forced to go out with the horrible Jessica. Jessica one of the bad non-supernatural guys. Because she likes to talk, isn't shy and thinks Bella is weird! Incredible!

So then Bella discovers that if she does stupid senseless things she will see Edward scolding her. Because what's better than a boyfriend who scolds you if you go on a motorcycle?
Here Jacob comes in, and being again near to a sexy guy Bella feels better. Until it turn out he's a werewolf and starts going around shirtless (ok, ok, my favourite part is when he takes his shirt off...), then he no longer wants to talk with Bella. So she falls again into depression, because the other guy who loves her isn't dangerous and feels disturbed by violence. Obviously he's no good.

At some point Edward decides to kill himself by revealing his sparkly vampire self. So Bella stops him, and a after a lot of sequences in which Bella gets to be saved by both vampires and werewolfs, Edward asks her to marry him. End of story.

During all the movie, there are various scenes depicting Bella wildly shouting and grasping at the bed while dreaming of Edward leaving her.

I'll leave you to judge. Or to watch these two movies that give a much better criticism than anything I  could possibly do:


  1. HAHA I wrote about new moon today too!
    Yes, the fricken hot jacob black yuuumy.
    lol (I think you'll like the videos on mine)